Hair-cuts are usually an event for me. I like to change my hair. I have a fabulous stylist who can match my hair to any picture I bring in. I always bring her a picture and she masterfully sculpts my hair.
I was so excited for my most recent cut. I had a short and sassy hair-cut picked out. It looked perfect for summer. As she was cutting my hair, she didn’t seem to be cutting it short enough. When she asked the first time, I did say it could be shorter in the back. I could tell we were not on the same wave-length. I knew I was going to be disappointed. When she was finished, it still wasn’t short enough. I didn’t say anything. I went home and fussed with it. It looked fine, but it wasn’t the short and sassy cut I was after.
I was really disappointed – in me – for not speaking up while I was in the chair. My stylist has always said she would fix my hair if it wasn’t right. So I began to question, “Do I dare call her and ask her to fix it? Why didn’t I say something while I was there? I knew it wasn’t short enough. I could just live with it. It’s not bad.”
Why do I struggle to speak up for myself? Do you struggle with this? Why is it so hard for me to use my voice and speak what’s on my heart? There are a lot of things I would like to say but fear keeps the words from coming out of my mouth. Fear of what? If my words and conduct are in the manner Paul speaks of in Philippians, I have nothing to fear. Right?
27 Whatever happens, conduct yourselves in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ. Then, whether I come and see you or only hear about you in my absence, I will know that you stand firm in the one Spirit,[e] striving together as one for the faith of the gospel 28 without being frightened in any way by those who oppose you. This is a sign to them that they will be destroyed, but that you will be saved—and that by God. Philippians 1:27-28
If I’m to conduct myself in a manner worthy of the gospel, I believe that includes using my voice to speak up for myself as well as others. I don’t think God really cares about my hair cut, but it served as a lesson for me to gain confidence in using my voice in areas that I am uncomfortable for His will. That includes using my voice for to speak truth for Him, myself, and others.
Yes, I did call and now my hair is short and sassy. Once we clarified the expectations, she was able to take off another inch, and I love it. I look at this experience as practice. I know there will be places where God is going to want me to use my voice to speak truth for Him, and I need the confidence to do it.
Do you need some confidence building with your voice? Where can you practice? Pick something small like a hair-cut and give it a try. Share your struggles and victories in using your voice.