If only…a phrase that can be so easy to use. If only I hadn’t said that. If only I was a better parent. If only I hadn’t gotten so angry. If only I exercised more. If only I had more willpower. If only I had more faith. If only I could trust more.
These are all phrases I have said to myself at one point or another. It always brings regret and distress. In fact, I found myself saying a lot of these phrases to myself recently. My heart filled with sorrow and then God showed up to take care of my “If only’s.”
10 Distress that drives us to God does that. It turns us around. It gets us back in the way of salvation. We never regret that kind of pain. But those who let distress drive them away from God are full of regrets, end up on a deathbed of regrets.
11-13 And now, isn’t it wonderful all the ways in which this distress has goaded you closer to God? You’re more alive, more concerned, more sensitive, more reverent, more human, more passionate, more responsible. Looked at from any angle, you’ve come out of this with purity of heart. And that is what I was hoping for in the first place when I wrote the letter. My primary concern was not for the one who did the wrong or even the one wronged, but for you—that you would realize and act upon the deep, deep ties between us before God. That’s what happened—and we felt just great. (2 Corinthians 7:10-13 NIV).
If only is a phrase of heartache. My heart was aching. I was regretting parenting choices I had made years ago. I assume all parents go through this at some point. The thought that I may have scared the hearts of my children in some way was overwhelming. I prayed and asked God for forgiveness again. I had done it before when He changed my heart.
At the same time I was so grateful that God had changed my heart, and I was no longer that person. “If only” can lead us toward God. He can take what is broken in our hearts and bring healing. I did end up more alive, more concerned, more sensitive.
He wants to take those regrets and turn them into gratitude. He wants to take what’s broken and bring restoration. He wants to mold our hearts to be more like His. Here is the best part-not only does he want to, but He will. This isn’t something that is offered to a random few of His children. He will do it for all of His children.
What are your “if only” phrases? Are you ready to lay them at the feet of Jesus and replace them with wholeness of heart and feeling more alive? Turn away from the regret and toward a Savior. He can and will do it for all of His children.
Share the regrets God has brought healing for you and we can inspire each other.